Biting is a common issue children with autism often must deal with .Supporting a child who bites others or hurts themselves can feel overwhelming, but it usually helps to view the behaviour as communication rather than “bad behaviour.” Most children bite or self-harm because they’re dysregulated, frustrated, overwhelmed, or unable to express a need safely yet. The goal is to teach safer ways to cope while keeping everyone safe.
Start with safety first. Calmly block or reduce harm without shaming. If they try to bite, gently move their body away or offer something safe to bite (chewy toy, teether, cloth). If they hit themselves, softly hold their hands or place a pillow between their hand and body. Stay neutral and steady—big reactions can accidentally reinforce the behaviour.
Then look for patterns. Ask yourself what happens right before and right after. Common triggers include sensory overload (noise, lights, crowds), transitions, frustration with communication, fatigue, hunger, or big emotions. Keeping notes for a few days can help you see themes. Once you know triggers, you can prevent many incidents by adjusting the environment—more breaks, quieter spaces, visual schedules, snacks, warnings before transitions.
Teach replacement skills when the child is calm, not during a meltdown. Practice simple, concrete alternatives:
- “Bite this chewy” or “squeeze this ball”
- “Stomp feet” or “push the wall” for big energy
- Simple words or signs like “help,” “stop,” “break”
- A calm-down corner with soft items, books, or sensory tools
Model and rehearse these often so they become automatic.
Reinforce the positive. Notice and praise even small successes: “You squeezed your ball when you were mad—that kept everyone safe.” Attention for safe coping helps it stick. Reinforcing the positive when a child bites can feel counter-intuitive at first, because you don’t want to “reward” the biting itself. The key is this: don’t give attention to the bite — give attention to the safe behaviour you want instead. You’re teaching what to do, not just what not to do.
Think in three moments: before, during, and after.
Before biting happens, catch and praise the behaviours that usually break down first. If they’re playing near others calmly, using words, waiting, or asking for help, name it specifically: “I like how you’re using gentle hands. ”Great job asking for a turn.”
“You kept your mouth safe”. This kind of attention makes those skills stronger and reduces the need to bite. When a child bites, stay neutral and brief. Block the bite and state the limit without emotion: “I won’t let you bite. Biting hurts.”
Then immediately redirect to the replacement: “Here’s your chewy.” or “Say ‘mine’ / ‘help’ / ‘stop.’ “No lectures, no big reactions, and minimal eye contact. Big reactions can accidentally reinforce the biting because attention is powerful.
Also consider underlying needs. Biting and self-injury can sometimes relate to sensory processing differences, communication delays, anxiety, trauma, or neurodevelopmental conditions. If behaviours are frequent, intense, or causing injury, it’s wise to get professional support. A paediatrician, child psychologist, occupational therapist, or behaviour specialist can assess triggers and build a plan tailored to a child.